Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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