I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Panties = found
Randomize
