windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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