i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
