yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize