I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
