Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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