Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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