brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
