hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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