She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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