Just cropdusted the office
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize