If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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