I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i already hear my dad disowning me
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
