you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
