i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
