I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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