Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
please come you make the beer taste better
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
you inspire me to be a worse person
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
