I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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