sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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