I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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