i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize