Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize