so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
