I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
