She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
