it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she pinky promised me she was 18
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
