was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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