She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Randomize
