I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
