somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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