The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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