You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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