So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
