Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
