i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
