I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Randomize