Kiss
Puke
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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