I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
