Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
