Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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