Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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