So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Randomize