Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
