uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I wish i was in the wii world.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
