we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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