I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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