windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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