Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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