Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
